Four types of men and women you should run away from

  • As children of God, you cannot relate with just anybody and everybody. You cannot fall in love with just anybody. There are men you should run from, and there are women you should not pray to fall in love with. Who are these people? That is the subject of our discourse this morning.

    The scripture is full of wisdom. Not just theoretical wisdom, but pragmatic wisdom that we can relate to in our day to day happenstances.

    If we can just stay within the boundary of God’s wisdom, we will avoid a lot of heartaches. If we can follow the simple tips offered to us in God’s word, we will enjoy some stability when it comes to relationship and marriage.

    There are many categories of people you cannot get involved with, but we will take a look at a few,

    1. The Unbeliever
    Coming top on the list is the unbeliever. If he or she doesn't know God and has not accepted Jesus Christ as personal saviour, you have no business befriending such. If you are not close friends, chances that you will fall in love with such a person is slim.

    I know ladies who in their bid to share the gospel with a fellow guy who is an unbeliever, they ended up sharing their body and got pregnant. I know guys who in their bid to win a soul, they actually lost theirs in the hands of unsuspecting jezebels!

    Be careful with those who don't know God. You are not on the same page. You will never think alike. To the pure, all things are pure, to the impure, all things are impure.

    "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers [ do not make mismated alliances with them or come under a different yoke with them, inconsistent with your faith ]. For what partnership have right living and right standing with God with iniquity and lawlessness? Or how can light have fellowship with darkness?"  (2Co 6:14, AMP)

    But Pastor, what if he is such a nice person? “Niceness” is not a fruit of the Spirit. In a moment of fit of anger, niceness can quickly morph into wickedness!

    Do you know that it takes the fear of God not to lift your hands against your wife? Do you know there are pastors who (shamefully and wrongfully) beat up their wives? So then, what do you think a person who doesn't know God would be capable of doing?

    My advice, if you have fallen in love with someone who doesn't know God, you should fall out quickly.

    2. The Liar
    Everybody has told a lie at one point or the other. There is even more probability that every human being, born again or not, have told a lie and then quickly asked God for forgiveness. Thank God for His mercy. Sometimes, you find yourself in some situations, and in order to save yourself some embarrassments, you tell a lie and then ask for forgiveness.

    But here, I am talking of pathological lairs. You cannot marry such a person. You cannot get involved with a compulsive, obsessive, inveterate, habitual, persistent, chronic, hardened, confirmed liar, or else you will be putting yourself into a lot of trouble.

    A good marriage and great family can't be built on foundation of habitual lies. It will crack. I know people who have lied to their spouses for more than forty years! Such lies eventually burst open, and the centre cannot hold.

    If he or she has been lying without remorse or repentance, it is time to run without looking back.

    3. The Jeru trap seeker
    That is all he or she wants in a relationship. Jeru trap! You met two hours ago, and he is already inviting you over to his house. To come and do what?

    You should also be scared of ladies you met and hours later, they are asking you to kiss them. I can tell you as marriage counsellor, something is not quite right.

    Pastor, are you not being too hard?  Well, if being hard is what will get you to heaven, you better be hard on yourself.

    I have handled several cases of people who slept with just one person and the person loses his or her mind. Not mild mental cases, but serious madness! Be careful! There are evil men and strange women. Free jeru trap can be eternal traps! The devil offers nothing for free. It is a fight for your soul.

    My take is still the same, and I think I speak as by the Spirit of God, if he or she is insisting on jeru trap before marriage, you have not met your spouse yet!

    But Pastor, what if we make mistakes? Yes, you can ask for forgiveness and really, God will forgive you! But if it happens again and again, then you need to read this scripture:

    "Do not be deceived and deluded and misled; God will not allow Himself to be sneered at (scorned, disdained, or mocked by mere pretensions or professions, or by His precepts being set aside.) [ He inevitably deludes himself who attempts to delude God ] For whatever a man sows, that and that only is what he will reap. For he who sows to his own flesh (lower nature, sensuality) will from the flesh reap decay and ruin and destruction, but he who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life."  (Gal 6:7-8, AMP)

    But Pastor, how will one be sure if he or she is good in bed?

    I can assure you, you are not a “tester” or a “sampler” I can also tell you that if you try it, you just invited demonic entities who will ensure that testing and sampling continues with more people and you will never see the right person that way!

    If you trust God, you are led of Him, and you know He is your father, you will be sure within your heart that He will not lead you into error!  I hope you know that God knows what He is going?

    How much if testing were you bale todo before you chose the family you were born into? How come you an no longer trust God when it comes to marriage?

    4. The Rebel
    Finally, run away from the rebel. Who is the rebel?

    He is out there. She is out there as well. Everybody is wrong except him or her. No mentor, no pastor, no authority figures. Nobody can speak to him or her. Nobody can correct her. Run away very fast!

    If he or she tells you he doesn't need anybody, it is usually a symptom of a deep seated problem swimming in a labyrinth of more issues.

    One of the greatest problems a person can have is not to be meek. Not teachable! It is a huge problem.

    If somebody has issues but is teachable, that is high probability that things will work out.

    A word to those who may be married to any of this type of people. It is not time to give up on your marriage. It is time to fight for it. As long as your life is not being threatened, you not being abused, violence is not involved and adultery is out of it, then you should fight for your marriage. Pray for him or her with heavenly persistence, and God will come to your rescue. God doesn't really want divorce, except in some rare cases I mentioned above. The first order of things is to fight for your marriage, not physically, but prayerfully and with good attitude!

    Pastor, what if I am in courtship with such a person? Seek help, meet your pastor, get him or her filled with the Holy Ghost but if there is stiff resistance to change, back out and deliver yourself from unnecessary affliction. Remember you will never be able to change anybody. Also, be aware pope can actually present to be good until after wedding. Be careful. Be led. Be prayerful. Stay in God’s word. Use this devotional daily and use the prayers in the evenings.

    May God help us all.

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    CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
    I have God's wisdom to rule in the affiars of this life

    PRAYER FOR THE DAY
    Father, I pray for your leading in my marital decisons

    THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
    "Don't be misled: No one makes a fool of God. What a person plants, he will harvest. The person who plants selfishness, ignoring the needs of others—ignoring God!—"  (Gal 6:7, MSG)

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