He or She Really Loved The Lord Until Now


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    The issue above is one of the commonest statements of regret from the hundreds of people that I counsel every other month.
     
    “Pastor, he has changed…”
     
    “Pastor, I never knew he was like this…”
     
    “Pastor, before we got married, he was a leader in the fellowship, but now, he doesn’t go to church…”
     
    “Pastor, during our courtship, he was so sweet, but now, he beats me up!
     
    “Pastor, I never knew him because our courtship was a distant one…”
     
    …And so on and so forth…
     
    Well, what went wrong along the way?
     
    Here are a few things to note.
     
    1. There are pretenders out there. There are people who will feign being in the faith just to get a ‘good’ girl that will not give them ‘problems’ in marriage. This is where Christian pre-marriage counseling comes in.
     
    2. That you met somebody in church does not guarantee that he or she is a true child of God. Anybody and everybody can attend church services for different purposes. Always seek counsel before you get involved with anybody.
     
    3. Not everybody in the church setting is looking for God. That is why phones and personal effects get missing in church. An angel didn’t steal them. They were stolen by people with whom you worship but with ulterior motives.
     
    4. Let the leadership of the church be involved in your relationship and marriage. There are some churches that have marriage guidance councils, these are not instituted to control you or spy into your private life but to guide you appropriately. Let your pastor be in the know. This is important because the pastor usually know the committed ones and those who are insincere to an extent.
     
    5. Learn all you can learn. Get marriage tips and free Christian advice online. On Kisses and Huggs Club, for example, we offer free Christian advice for singles and married couples and you can get advice on marriage issues on our daily devotionals, daily discussions and several other materials online. Don’t walk into a marriage ignorantly and so naïve that you fall for anything.
     
    6. As a marriage counselor for some years, I can rightly say that it is true some people really love the Lord, but along the way, there is a turn around. This can be due to negative influence, change of environment, pressure that comes with marriage, choice of career and so on. Whatever it is, when you find yourself in this kind of scenario, you need to quickly find a marriage counselor to talk to.
     
    7. When you meet a new person in a church setting, beyond falling in love with some height or some hot legs, find out how involved he is in church. Is he or she a worker in that church? How long has he or she been in the church? Does the pastor know him or her personally? Is he filled with the Holy Spirit? All these do not guarantee a successful or stress free marriage, however, they go a long way to establish some credibility and spirituality of the person involved. This is a better approach than meeting someone in church and on the same day, you are in his house! You must learn how to protect yourself!
     
    8. You need to know that being born again can be genuine and yet the guy or lady is still involved in some sharp practices. When you are born again, your spirit is regenerated, but your mind is in the process of being renewed as you listen to God’s word. This often takes time and is determined by how studious you are in the word and how much time you give to the study of God’s word. In the process of the mind being renewed, a lot of ‘sinful’ mistakes can happen. As long as they are not habitual, God will forgive and you will be okay. But when you do something habitually and unrepentantly, the conscience becomes seared and a religious spirit takes over.
     
    9. When you see obvious character defects, don’t close your eyes to them especially when he or she says he will change later. Marriage changes nobody. Anybody that tells you he or she will change later is deceiving you. What do you do when you see character defects? Seek help! Don’t keep quiet.
     
    10. If during courtship or after marriage, you suddenly discover you never knew who you were in the same boat with, here is what to do. In courtship, take a pause on everything until you find a solution. For example, if the issues has to do with physical violence or physical abuse, don’t just keep quiet thinking that marriage will soften him. Don’t walk down the aisle into that kind of marriage, or you might need to soon run up the aisle and out! If you are getting slaps in courtship, guess what will happen in marriage? In marriage, divorce is not the first option. Look for a Christian marriage counselor or marriage therapist for help.
     
    11. If you are in a distant relationship or some online dating, you need to know that you will not have a distant marriage and you will not live online. The reality must dawn on you never to make life-involving decisions without knowing the person very well. It is wrong for you to fall in love with a stranger. Something is not quite right with falling in love with an online profile or some voice over the phone! Marriage is a not a game! It is a covenant!
     
    12. Finally, we are all projects in the making in the hands of God. Nobody is perfect, but there are things that are unbecoming for a child of God. When you see some of these things, it is time to seek help, or if intense, run for your life!
     

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    CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
    I have God's wisdom to discern

    I am focused on the things of God. i am not confused - See more at: file:///Users/revdunamis/Desktop/Devotionals/Ade%20and%20Christie%20fell%20in%20love%20on%20Campus_%20the%20story%20and%20the%20lessons%20-%20Past%20Devotionals%20-%20Kisses%20and%20Huggs%20Club.html#sthash.aMzBc6Hp.dpuf
    I am focused on the things of God. i am not confused - See more at: file:///Users/revdunamis/Desktop/Devotionals/Ade%20and%20Christie%20fell%20in%20love%20on%20Campus_%20the%20story%20and%20the%20lessons%20-%20Past%20Devotionals%20-%20Kisses%20and%20Huggs%20Club.html#sthash.aMzBc6Hp.dpuf
    I will seek to understand my fiancé/fiancee/spouse's love language - See more at: file:///Users/revdunamis/Desktop/Devotionals/When%20you%20are%20in%20love%20with%20the%20one%20whose%20love%20language%20is%20gifts%20-%20Daily%20Devotionals%20-%20Kisses%20and%20Huggs%20Club.html#sthash.GILhvNy3.dpuf


    PRAYER FOR THE DAY
    Lord, teach me to know the right thing to do.

    THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
    Hebrews 5:14 (KJV)  
    But strong meat belongeth to them that are of full age, even those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil.

    ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
    Give towards KHC Camp-Meeting 2016 . Check links below

    READ THROUGH THE BIBLE IN ONE YEAR
    Luke 18


    Pastor Dunamis - +234 802 350 7395

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