Dear Pastor, Why Is My Toaster Suddenly Disinterested?

  • It happens all the time. He was all over you. He was certain he loved you. His mouth was running like he had mouth diarrhea! He “toasted” you till he had no words again. You were too sure this one would get married to you.
    And all of a sudden, after two or three dates, the love fire died slowly, he could no longer find airtime on his phone to call, he simply withdrew and stopped seeing you.
    Sometimes, it is the other way round.
    She said yes! She loved you. You could see it in her eyes. She verbalized it. She told you that you were an answer to her prayers. She expressed how much favored she is by God by meeting you.
    And then in a moment of time, she stopped picking your calls, she avoided you like a plague, she told you she needs to hear God again, and all of that.
    Now, when this happens, we are quick to say that there is diabolical power somewhere! We are quick to say somebody is following you from the village.
    Well, while the power of demonic influences can be real, most of the rejections we face or experience are nothing close to demonic influences.
    What we need to understand is that there are some general turn offs.
    And that is what i want to show you this morning.
    First the ladies!
    What are the turn-offs?
    1. Ladies with Low Self Esteem
    Most guys know exactly what they want in marriage. They want confident ladies!
    If any guy gravitates towards you despite a chronic self esteem issue, watch it, he could just be taking advantage of you knowing that jeru trip will be free and for all.
    Ladies with low self esteem will not mind offering their bodies in exchange for love and affirmation. Click to Tweet
    Sadly enough, such affirmations are lies. He is only telling you what you want to hear as long as he is getting what he wants to get! Click to Tweet
    Be yourself! Don’t dumb yourself down in front of a guy or try to appear less smarter than you are.
    Don’t overrate yourself or try to appear you know more than you actually know. You will embarrass yourself that way.
    Just be yourself.
    Guys love ladies who are just themselves, who don’t care a hoot about what you think of who they are!
    They are just themselves. No air around them. No fake phonetics!
    Everybody wants that originality! Never ever think acting and trying to be who you are not will earn you any good man!
    If you want to attract a good man, be who you are! Click to Tweet
    If he doesn't like you being you, let him go! He is not qualified enough to handle your greatness! Click to Tweet
    If your legs are not straight, don't hide it from the very first day!
    Let him see it like that, if he doesn't like K-legs or bow legs, that is his problem, not yours!
    There are guys who are looking for that K-leg or bow leg! Stop hiding it with long gowns!
    Remember you will have to show that k-leg or bow leg to him after wedding day after day for the next sixty years or so!
    It is better to keep showing them to a man who is enraptured at them than to a man who is disgusted and keep saying you are a creative mistake!
    So, let him see it from day one! If he wants to go because of that, let him go, his name is Abedne-go! Click to Tweet
    Don’t hide your cute tribal marks with make-up! They are the marks of the Lord Jesus Christ, so let no man trouble you! Click to Tweet
    Just be yourself!
    There is somebody out there who will love you for just being yourself!
    If you hide this and that and then after the third or fourth date, he suddenly discovers some things, he can simply back out, thinking you are not sincere and that you could be hiding some other things. Remember guys are logical!
    When you find yourself, in a low self esteem issue, most times it is not your fault.
    It could be background, it could be the fact that nobody ever affirmed you, it could be that you were sexually abused or even verbally abused. Whatever it is, I want you to know that in God, your esteem can be restored.
    As you dive into God’s word daily, you will find your true identity. Click to Tweet
    Search for identity in wrong places is what often leads to campus prostitution, adultery, drug culture, partying hard and other societal vices.
    Search for identity in wrong people can lead to a sexually promiscuous life. It can make a lady become so generous with her body as she searching for true love.
    All these would kill her esteem the more at the end of the day.
    Your identity can be found in the one who made you! Go after God, learn from His word and know your rights in God. Click to Tweet
    Meditate in God’s word daily! It will be up your self esteem.
    Focus on your strengths and stop brooding on your weaknesses. Click to Tweet
    Avoid negative talks and stop talking down on yourself.
    Get a confession of God’s word on who you are in Him and confess them daily.
    I will continue tomorrow and course we will talk about the guys too.
    Have a terrific week ahead!
    Shout out to all KHC Partners, God will honour you!
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    I am blessed in God


    Lord, build me up from within   

    Romans 12:2 (AMP)  Do not be conformed to this world (this age), [ fashioned after and adapted to its external, superficial customs ], but be transformed (changed) by the [ entire ] renewal of your mind [ by its new ideals and its new attitude ], so that you may prove [ for yourselves ] what is the good and acceptable and perfect will of God, even the thing which is good and acceptable and perfect [ in His sight for you ].

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    Day 61: Numbers 16 - 17, Psalm 90

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