Forums » Awakening Love and Purity
Like Election like Marriage
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As we head to the pools this morning to choose our president for the next four years, it occurred to me that like marriage, once we make that choice today, there is no going back! Unlike in elections where we have the opportunity to choose another leader every four years, marriage is for life!
Like voters, the only power we have as singles is before we append our thumbprint to that “ballot paper” after that we have to live with our choice.
The politicians are being nice and generous now, we see them on our streets almost every day; they are bringing gifts and promises, texting and calling us every day; apologizing when is not even necessary…..
As I ponder all these and what will happen after we give them our votes, I cannot but remembered what I wrote earlier about ‘”Unveiling the bad wine” and what the bible says in John chapter 2:10 Every man at the beginning doth set forth good wine; and when men have well drunk, then that which is worse…
The politicians are given us the good wine now we all know what happens when we drunkenly vote for the wrong candidates_ four years of suffering!
Am not an expert in politics, therefore I don’t have any tips for us on “how to vote the right candidate” however; I can give us a few tips as it relates to choosing a life partner.
4 TIPS ON CHOOSING THE RIGHT PARTNER
1. Ask God: No matter how smart you are, you can never be smarter than God. He knows the end from the beginning. He has a good plan for your future and He knows who is suitable for that future. Jer 29:11 Never choose a partner based on your own head knowledge. Things are not always the way they appear. Jesus said in John 7:24 Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment.
1Samuel 16:7 reiterates the same principle But the LORD said unto Samuel, Look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature; because I have refused him: for the LORD seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the LORD looketh on the heart.
The heart of man is deep and desperately wicked; no one can know it but God…. The place of God cannot be over emphasis in choosing a life partner.
2. Ask questions there is a Yoruba adage that says “he that asks questions cannot miss road” this is especially true when it comes to the choice of a life partner. Never assume you know everything about someone. Like Rev Dunamis always say: “questions reveal the state of the heart” Don’t just go with the flow. Ask him/her about her beliefs on fundamental issues of life like faith, family and finance….also ask other people what they think about your potential spouse.
In as much as they won’t make the choice for you, their objective opinions can go a long way in making a well informed decision. Married people must of necessity ignore negative reports about their spouse but as singles, you must never ignore what people are saying about your potential partner. If you see him/her as an angel and everyone else is saying s/he is a devil; you need to get yourself a new set of lens.
3. Observe the way he/she treats others. I always tell sisters: “the way a guy treats you is not as important as how he treats the other people his life” his dad, mum and sister because in the end when the initial excitements wears off you’ll become just like one of them _family member. That goes for brothers too, if she treats you like a king and treats her dad like trash, beware it will soon be your turn. I know you are special and you expect your future partner to treat you specially but there must be a level of consistency in the way he/she treats you and others.
I personally can’t stand people who treat others based on their status. You treat a rich man like a god and spit on the gate man. That’s not character. God expects us to treat all men with love and respect. If this virtue is missing in your future spouse, you should seriously re-consider, it could be a sign of something deeper.
4. Take it slow and get to know: I have regrettably observed that most of the problems we have with relationships are a result of impatience, moving too fast….. One of the greatest undoing of the 21st century is the microwave syndrome. We want everything and we want it now! Manufacturers are taking advantage of this weakness and they keep inventing faster technologies_ Edge, 3G, 4G…. however, nature has thought us that not everything can be speed up.
A woman must carry her feotus for 9 months; a baby must learn to stand before walking…. Many singles have ruined potentially great relationships by moving too fast. And am not just talking about getting physical too fast (although it is part of it) but am more particular about the growth of the relationship. One of the best ways of knowing the will of God in choosing a life partner is WAITING! Jacob waited for several years to marry his beloved...Motives are not easily discerned. Trust God but test people. That’s scriptural. '...the Lord your God led you ...forty years, to humble you and to test you in order to know what was in your heart...' (Deut 8:2 NIV). You can do the same to your potential spouse.
Well...maybe not up to 40 years! But for a reasonable period of time. People can keep their intentions and motives covered for a long time, but waiting generally forces the truth to the surface. Brothers and especially sisters you need to cultivate the habit of waiting on The Lord. Remember: "every good and perfect gift (including a good spouse) is from the Lord" and it’s worth the wait. He that believes shall not make haste. If you are in a hurry, it’s a sign that you are not walking in faith. And anything that is not of faith the bible says it is a sin.
Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
.....a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing
Kindly leave your comments and observations.
I love to hear from you.
You can also connect with me on:
twitter @obayinde
facebook: www.facebook.com/indelibuluv
email: beminamorata@yahoo.com
This post was edited by Pastor Dunamis Okunowo at March 28, 2015 1:20 PM CET -
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