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The Bad Habit of Nagging in your Relationship

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    • 93 posts
    January 23, 2015 6:45 AM CET

    The truth is that most of us nag in our relationships. It is easier to point an accusing finger  at others while not taking heed to ourselves to try and work on our destructive habits. The whole essence of being Christians is to allow the nature of Christ become our nature and be like Him including in our relationships and the way we treat our loved ones. We are still pressing forth in KHC, pressing forth to making our relationships show forth God's glory.


    Lately I began to have a feeling I might be nagging in a very subtle and very unconscious but sincere way. Whenever myself and my hubby are traveling I find myself driving with him. I was no longer the relaxed me, enjoying the drive with him. Whenever he is overtaking, I am the second driver pressing the brakes with him.


    I try hard to worship in between or pray in tongues but I discover that even in that state I am still a little agitated. Is it the spirit of fear? No, I thought to myself. What of if he was tired and he's dozing? I am just being his help meet now? But while I searched deeper I actually discovered I was beginning to allow the spirit of fear.

    I work a diagnostic center and I have seen and heard of lots of accidents. Most times my hubby will be like, ' why are you afraid, you better rebuke that spirit of fear'. But I felt some one has to keep watch. My intentions are okay as I want to watch out for him and be his other pair of eyes (as if one needed four eyes to drive). I however found myself always saying, careful o, don't drive fast o, we are in a corner o... I begin to notice he may not be enjoying it. Then, our last journey he said why not just pray instead of worrying.

    I read an article about nagging and I sense the Holy Spirit drawing my attention in that direction and in handling the boys (our kids). Now, to nag is defined as 'to find fault incessantly, to irritate by constant scolding or urging, to worry, to pick at someone).

    I discovered I am beginning to nag more especially as the pressures increase, of work demand, school, raising three boys, ministry, finances, trying to be a good daughter to my parents, mentor to some, a good protégée to our mentors and of cause a good wife to a busy husband and a good mum to three active bubbling boys who want to be themselves - boys.

    I find myself exhibiting some military tendencies. As much as I tried to reduce (not stop) my military stance, I found it really difficult. But as I give thoughts and read an article on nagging I began to see myself. May God continually help us to see ourselves just the way we are. Pressures most times have a way of bringing out some hidden stuffs in us.

    Here are some truths about nagging:
    1.  Many people who nag don’t even realize they’re doing it. They think they are just trying  to help.

    2. The one nagging falsely assumes that they are changing the other’s behavior. Yet forgetting that God is the only One who can truly change another’s heart.

    3. Nagging is not only a weakness of women. Men nag too. It goes both ways. And though it’s normally talked about within the framework of a marriage, many parents struggle greatly with nagging their kids.

    4. Often those that nag fight hard and strong. They’re quick to voice opinions, have a strong need to be heard, be in control, and sincerely believe that their words are somehow benefiting the other person.

    We will continue about the dangers of nagging and how to overcome it.
    God bless you.

  • January 23, 2015 7:07 AM CET
    This is an eye opener, God bless you Ma.
    • 3 posts
    January 23, 2015 10:33 AM CET
    You've well ma
  • January 23, 2015 4:57 PM CET


    • 8 posts
    January 24, 2015 6:22 AM CET
    Amen, And u too!
    This post was edited by Tina Ug at January 24, 2015 6:31 AM CET
  • January 27, 2015 11:03 PM CET
    This msg is just for me,i'm so blessed