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Five Ways To Handle Depression As A Couple Part 2

Yesterday, we started discussing ways we can be there for our spouse in their down moments and vice versa. We established the importance of being a comforter to our spouse.
 
 
This is very important because your spouse is supposed to be the closest person to you. The covenant relationship that exists between couples is such that both of them can rely on their spouse to receive emotional strength when they are down.
 
No other person especially of the opposite sex should be allowed to take up this responsibility. 

 
Wives should be careful not to create a vacuum that will be filled by another lady somewhere. Once your husband can successfully find comfort and solace with another lady when he is down, the marriage is at the verge of breaking. 


 
Extra marital affairs does not begin when there is sexual relationship but begins with emotional connections and affairs where there is mutual emotional companionship.
 
Likewise, husbands should be available and present emotionally for their wives. Husbands are not meant to be their wives’ instructors, where all they do is give instructions and lecture their wives. 

Let there be companionship, deep friendship and genuine understanding.
 
In this way the wife can find a true friend in her husband. 

I believe this is what the bible is referring to when it talked about the fact that they were ‘naked and not ashamed’. It was not just about jeru trip but about deep and genuine friendship, companionship and oneness.
 
Here are the remaining points.
 
3. Be empathic
 
Being empathic is very crucial in being a genuine source of comfort to your spouse when they are down or depressed.
 
Being empathic makes you put yourself in the shoes of your spouse. You feel what they are feeling. You get involved by momentarily assuming you are the person in the situation. It is not the best to be critical or judgemental of your spouse when they are down. Even if you feel like doing that, self control is restraining yourself from doing what you feel easiest to do but may not necessarily yield the best result. You can not adequately comfort without empathy.

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CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I love my spouse

PRAYER FOR THE DAY

Pray that your love will be rooted in God 



THOUGHT FOR THE DAY 

Luk 8:6 (MSG)  Other seed fell in the gravel; it sprouted, but withered because it didn't have good roots.

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY

Give today

READ THROUGH THE BIBLE IN ONE YEAR 

Galatians 1 - 3

 
 
4. Be a good listener
 
The ability to give time and attention to listen to your spouse when they are down is very priceless. Don’t be in a hurry or irritable at your spouse when they are down. Your patience at this time is a proof that you are an understanding spouse. You will increase your deposits in the emotional bank of your spouse by so doing
 
5. Offer helpful solution without lecturing or judging
 
It is also very helpful to offer solution that will help alleviate the pain of your spouse at this time.
 
However, the solution you offer must come after you have shown a level of care, tenderness and empathy so that your advice will be received with love and as an act of kindness.
 
Practice these and your marriage will improve.
 
God bless your marriage.
 

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This Piece Is Authored By

Pastor Sophia Okunowo

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