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How To Handle Your 'Ex' As A Married Person

One of the most difficult things to do is the forget your 'Ex' or put him /her out of your mind. But it is not impossible to put your 'Ex' behind you because in the real sense that is what he/she is to you - the past. It is a great temptation because what happens in mind will happen in time.
There are about six scenarios that can play out itself when it comes to situation with your 'Ex'.
1. Your 'Ex' could be a burden to you or a source of pain that you were so excited leaving him /her
2. You could love your 'Ex' so much that your parting ways was not a pleasant experience at all, in your mind you still wished he /she ws the one you were married to.
3. He/she became your 'Ex' because of parental issues, Genotype issues or other health related issues.
4. You regretted leaving your 'Ex' because you took a rash or hasty decision.
5. You were not patient enough to handle his/her excesses. So you decided to leave him/her out of your impatience.
6. You left your 'Ex' because you were both young and immature and now you wish you knew better.
People leave their 'Ex' for all sorts of reasons, imaginable and unimaginable. It even becomes more difficult if you had sex with you 'Ex'. It becomes more complicated if you have some form of soul ties with him/her.
Having soul ties with your 'Ex' is not a matter of whether he /she was nice or not. Soul ties are real and very difficult to break.
It becomes more serious when you are not enjoying your marriage or your husband or wife is giving you a tough time or your spouse does not appreciate you. You have enough reasons to compare your spouse with your 'Ex'.
You have been sexually involved, you even have a sexual basis for comparison. The issue becomes a lot more complicated if both of you still see each other, if he/she is also not happy with his/her spouse, if you already started seeing each other, and you have started having dates or dinner together.
You may not out-rightly marry yourselves but there is a high possibility that you will sleep together and cheat on your spouse.
So how do you handle your 'Ex'? With all the possible scenarios, temptations and you are not enjoying your marriage. Or may even be enjoying your marriage and your 'Ex' just want to flirt around with you for the sake of it.
1. You handle this matter very seriously because anything that is about to kill you or your marriage should not be handled with levity.
2. Don't keep any secrets from your wife/ husband as it relates to your 'Ex'. Your spouse is there to help you.
3. Avoid seeing your 'Ex' or having any form of conversation with him/her. One conversation leads to another and then you become intimate again.
4. Avoid any form of close contacts, compassion or giving him/her money. This may trap you.
5. Avoid any form of help. Whether you are helping out with his/her kids even if your children go to the same school. Any form of help could be risky and rekindle old flames.
6. Don't be alone together or be in compromising places together.
7. Don't give him/her important and personal information. It can be used against you.
8. Don't discuss your spouse with your 'Ex'. Talk about your spouse with fondness, this will help keep your 'Ex' away.
If you were once married to them (you had kids together) and now have a new wife or husband, with kids here are some helpful hints:
1. You are not thinking of getting married to him/her again since you have remarried, so avoid every form of close contact.
2. If you have to communicate, let it be because of the children and keep it short and snappy and preferable a phone conversation.
3. Don't keep what you discussed away from your spouse. Avoid keeping secrets from your spouse.
4. Avoid dates, dinner, parties or any form of meeting at hotels or guest house.
5. Don't be alone in compromising situations.
6. Talk about your spouse every time you are together.
7. Don't discuss the faults of your spouse with your 'Ex' for any reason. Even the greatest of marriages have their own challenges.
8. Love your spouse unconditionally and don't walk in the flesh so that you do not gratify the works of the flesh.
God bless your marriage
I don't hide anything from my spouse.
Father, teach me to handle the issue of my 'Ex' well in Jesus name,
Whosoever is in Christ is a new creature, old things are passed away, behold all things have become new.
Follow the dos and dont's about handling your 'Ex'

Isaiah 23 - 27

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This Piece Is Authored By

Pastor Sophia Okunowo

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