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How To Know If Your Lover Really Loves You

“Angie baby, you know I really love you!”

 
That is the name he usually calls her. As he held her hands and looked into her eyes, Angie tried to look back into his eyes and beyond the words, to really find out if Buddy meant his words, but she couldn't decipher anything.
 


“Well, I am not sure” replied Angie.
 
“Why would you say that,” Buddy said, still holding her hands.
 
“You are going for NYSC next week, I am not sure what you will come back with.”
 
“Oh, common, Angie, we have been together for four years now and by the grace of God, we will get married soonest. You have no reasons to doubt me.”
 
“I don’t doubt you, but I get scared sometimes.”
 
“Angie now, why would you be scared?”
 
“You know what happened….”
 
“Don’t go there!” Buddy cuts in, raising his voice a bit. “I have already asked for forgiveness and that it wouldn't happen again. I thought you have forgiven me?”
 
And they went on and on.
 
Angie has her fears because of the mistake that Buddy made of recent with another girl that he slept with whom he initially claimed he was mentoring. How did a protégée end up in bed? What type of mentoring is that? There is a difference between a mentor and a tormentor!
 
Angie wasn't sure whether it was a genuine mistake or a state of his heart. If it is a state of his heart, then he would still do it again.
 
But the dilemma is that you cannot enter a man’s heart!


 
Only someone knows the heart of a man, and that is God. Angie knows he would need God to really make up her mind, as she wouldn't want to be hurt and disappointed again.
 
How do you now a man’s heart? How do you know a guy who loves you and will eventually marry you? That is our subject of discourse this morning.
 
1. He will love God first
This is the first acid test to know whether a man would really love you appropriately or understands what love is.
 
Listen to me, guys, you will never be able to love a lady the right way until you love God first.

You don't love a woman with money alone or with fame, otherwise, the love tangos of celebrities should have been successful, but that is not always the case. The fundamental cause of marriage failure among them is that they don’t know God.
 
God is love and love without God is no love, it becomes lust!


 
Is he a God-lover? If he has issues with loving God, he will have issues with loving you. True love can only be shed abroad in your heart by the Spirit of God.
 
It is only the God factor in a man that won’t allow him to lift up his hands against his wife in the days on anger.
 
Will those days come? Yes, they will come, but what will restrain a man from the tendency of beating and battering his wife is that fear of God.
 
So then, Pastor how do you know a man that loves God?
 
a. He would want to obey God always. If you love God, you will keep His commandments. That is what Jesus said. He wouldn’t be insisting on sex.
 
b. He will serve God with his time. He wouldn't be too busy to serve God in any capacity.
 
c. He will serve God with his finances. He will not struggle with tithe. That is how you know a man that really loves God.
 
d. He will listen to his pastor or mentor. If a man loves God, he wouldn’t have problems with the servants of God.
 
e. He doesn’t joke with his devotional life. He knows that is the source of his strength in God.
 
f. He will not manipulate your emotions or try to use you. The fear of God in him would not allow all that.
 
g. He will not be “okay” with habitual sins. He will be uncomfortable with offending God in anyway.
 
h. He will not be able to accommodate strife for too long. He will be forgiving and will not be comfortable quarreling for extended number of days without feeling bad about that attitude.
 
I can go on and on but those are just a few.
 
At the background of all these, however is the fact that nobody is perfect, and nobody will have it all. You will never be able to see a man that has it all. We are all “works of project” in the making.
 
So there may be mistakes here and there, but you will see signs of genuine repentance and willingness to make adjustments.
 
At the height of all these, do you have peace? If you have peace, then go ahead, irrespective of some imperfections. When I say, imperfections, I don't mean consistent habitual sins!
 
I will stop this morning and I will conclude this topic tomorrow.


CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I am led by the Spirit of God

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, teach me in the way to go and guide my feet into your plans
 
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

"No one who abides in Him [ who lives and remains in communion with and in obedience to Him—deliberately, knowingly, and habitually ] commits (practices) sin. No one who [ habitually ] sins has either seen or known Him [ recognized, perceived, or understood Him, or has had an experiential acquaintance with Him ]." (1Jn 3:6, AMP)

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY

Read 1 Cor 13
 
READ THROUGH THE BIBLE IN ONE YEAR
2 Kings 12-13; 2 Chronicles 24

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This Piece Is Authored By

Pastor Dunamis Okunowo

Dunamis & Sophia are facilitators of Kisses and Huggs Club. They are ministers, writers, conference speakers, relationship counselors and marriage...

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